As life has been passing me by these past few weeks, months even, I have become very aware of the fact that i literally cannot do anything on my own. Seriously... Nothing. With me and all that is included in my life there always seems to be a catch, or something that must go wrong or unexpectedly. I dont know if everyone or anyone else has ever felt this way but its as if it goes wrong just because its me! If it was ANYONE else it would be peachy keen! But hello, I am Brittany Marie Brandner therefore, life isnt like the movies! I look around and i see my best friends in love and preparing for engagement or even weddings. I have watched people go away to colleges to work on their big degree, or move away to discover what the next adventure in their life is going to be. To put it plainly... I dont have that kind of excitement in my life right now.
I had applied to go on a year long mission in Africa with an organization called Operation Mobilization last October. Things with them are moving quite slowly so i am still not sure if i meet the standard of the kind of person they are looking for or however that whole thing works. I go to Community College and Northeast Lakeview College and am working on my Associates Degree. I should be done with that by October this year. I live at home, and rarely ever do anything on the weekends. My life is ordinary, plain and right now boring. I have entered into a cycle of motions that only seem to repeat themselves. I dont know what the future holds for me, whether God wills me to go on this mission, or to do something else i have no idea. I havent a clue on a lot of things lately...
The only thing i know is that God loves me. And he has a purpose for me and my life. Random lyrics from random Klove songs will pop in and out of my head sporadically. One of them has been He will Carry me, Love will hold us together, Like sunlight burning at midnight making my life something so beautiful, Mercy reaching to save me, Come as you are, Oh how he loves us! Songs of Hope and Love... I know this time of temporary boredom and confusion on what my next step is going to be will be done and gone in a blink of an eye. I hope i have opened up my heart and mind to be receptive to what God really is trying to show me in this time... Prayer is always appreciated! :)
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